I always come here to write. I feel like I should write. But when I get here.. it's blank.
Things are changing. We'll start with that...
Feeling a lot older than usual. Very stressed. Deactivated my Facebook, I think it may be for good this time. I have no urges to check it like previous times. I truly realized that the 'people' on Facebook are there to gossip and care nothing more about any one than only themselves. They are not support. They are not my friends. So, that is over.
So it seems, I have narrowed down my 'list of friends' in real life, to a very small few. That also seems to be much more genuine.
My dad has stepped back in to my life after not being there for a few months. Its nice to get him back. My mom has been there and that is good. We still fight often but, that is okay. Were doing our best. Rob and I are like the ocean. Sometimes, its a storm, sometimes.. its calm and beautiful. I think maybe love is supposed to be that way.
Nothing is picture perfect and life is very hard. Its also easy in all the same breath. Juggling everything can get heavy, but it isn't always.. and all of the time. I'm trying my best.
I feel like I'm turning in to quite the procrastinator.. which is turning out to be not so good for me. Lol. But it feels that... theres always this huge list of things that needs to get done. I just keep putting them off by cleaning and going circles.
I don't know why its like this either.
I've been really catching my pain body lately. It's been feeding a lot. Draining me a lot. I can't stop. Well, I know that I can.. but its very, VERY hard.
It will take practice. I keep letting it take over me. It reminds me of when I was younger... It reminds me of being angry with my family. Maybe I still I am.
I think I need a professional hypnotherapist. A session, perhaps two.
